Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Brokenhearted me

How will I say it?
I always wanted to shout to the world every time I felt any pain. But even once no one knows how it hurts every time I am suffering from pain. I am very shy in terms of my emotional crisis. I never shared it to anyone. I cannot find right terms to be used how it hurts inside. I still manage to smile and find humor in everything I saw and said. Sometimes I thought maybe because I am already vulnerable to pain, but I am not. I always find myself crying and I cannot find someone that can ease up the pain I felt inside.
 It’s true what everyone claimed, it sounds corny to few but for me it is not. I always find refuge to the LORD above. It is the only way where I know can understand everything. I cannot tell the people I love if I am hurt because of this person because I know they will HATE the certain person that cause me pain since they had never connection with the certain person. If a circumstance causes me pain they find someone who causes it and hate them. If the system causes me suffering they will blame the system. I already figured it out what will be their reactions but it will not lessen the pain I felt. I am not a type to ask for advice what should I do and have done, but unsolicited advice are still welcome (Well, I listen but never put everything in mind). I just lift everything to the most high. Sometimes it make me smile since it came to my mind that I make Jesus a puzzle solver when I am broken I let him make me whole again and if few pieces are missing He will fill it up.
What the point is what Mother Theresa said “Love ‘til it hurts and it hurts no more.”

But ouch!!!! It really do hurt..
originally written 4:55 A.M. March 12, 2014

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Site Inspection

During Site inspection
Hey! hey parents.
Look at this two little angels? They made my day looking at them smiling while I'm documenting the accomplishment of the project we inspected. I'm asking what is the children doing at the site during school days/time?
I don't know what are the jobs and chores the parents are doing or if they still have parents but what comes to my mind is that they should have been enjoying learning in school at the time i took this photo. I don't know if they already know how to read and write or maybe today is no class which I don't know.
My point is, the challenge for every parents is to send their children to school come what may. Despite the financial in-capabilities. 
Looking at the situation makes me think again the thought of sending one of my volunteers in youth ministry to school. I know I don't have enough money supporting my younger brothers in college and here's another teen whose willing to serve and work to gain her studies. How can I say no?
But as what I want and I am obsessed to change. I want to start the change in me.
I just need to have a faith that the Divine Providence will be there.
A change that we need not to wait to earn more to serve and help. What we got even nothing we have we still can help. 
Challenge I give to myself to find ways to help even one or two. And I believe it will multiply.

Friday, March 7, 2014

Getting Started

Inspired by Bianca I already find this thing amazing and exciting. Inspiring her follower to write down what it is in their mind. Writing down inspiring articles and showing that positive vibes can make our life happy and meaningful.
I now have a blog of my own. I loved to write diaries during my early teens and I already misplaced it. During happy moments and bad times I find it very useful to write it down and read it again to decide on my own what is the effective thing to do.
And now I want to make a great start!!
 Happy me to a blogger.